Porter was a little under the weather last week from preschool and so we decided to lay low and not infect the other classmates. Because of this, we missed the awesome turkey project that the room moms graciously put together for each child. When I received my “bag of turkey parts” from my room mom I immediately took a look at the items, sighed -rolled my eyes, and sent her a prompt email! Taken in pieces, it made no sense but all together, it was perfect! Here are the list of items and then some pics of how we put it all together.

Needed:

1 large cardboard plate

1 small cardboard plate

several different colored feathers

2 popsicle sticks – I don’t know how they cut those notches in the sticks – but they are not necessary.

1 small triangle for the nose (can be wooden or construction paper)

1 wooden small ice cream spoon (see turkey pics – it’s the wattle)

2 goggly eyes

brown, orange paint

Circle of beige construction paper for turkey’s face

black construction paper top hat for turkey’s head.

First we painted the paper plates, the triangle nose, the wattle and the legs. After that dried over night we used glue all the pieces together and then inserted the legs and feather. Pretty simple but pretty cute!

Turkey Parts (already painted the plates, wattle and legs)

All Done! GOBBLE GOBBLE

Before we go to gymnastics we sometimes hit the playground if we have some extra time.

Playing with the Trio’s from Michael and Dotty from the kid’s birthday parties back in July.

Look at my big boy go!

Our puppy being silly with her leash. She’s a lot older, maybe three months or so now.

My friend Amanda brings her boy over Miller one day for shirt dyeing, water sliding and other miscellaneous summer activities. We wore him and Gracie out so they climbed up on the couch for some jam sessions… enjoy.

So about five years ago I was cruising along on the road near my house that is a two lanes each way with a median and that deceptively feels like it should be 50 – 55 miles an hour and yet is a measly 45. The cops *love* this and frequently set up ridiculous speed traps all along the road and especially at areas where there are no lights or after large hills. After receiving my first and only ticket in years (I was going 58 in a 45 on THAT road) and watching the cop write out a ticket while I was in tears and my six month old was screaming in his car seat I vowed to never speed on that road again. So today when I was in front of Mr. BMW Busy Bee and he was riding right on my Odyssey’s tail pipe I secretly smiled knowing that more then likely, just ahead would be a speed trap. I calmly checked my speed (48 mph …good) and waited for him to get frustrated and go around me. Sure enough he whips around me, slams on the gas and uh oh….oh no…. what’s <screech> that? He slams on his brakes as the cops on the right side of the road hits their lights and the cop holding the radar gun starts walking into the center of the road. I smugly smile and think “dumbass” and slow down as the cop is motioning for us to stop. I think, “hmm, he’s just being safe because there is no way he’s pulling me over….” Then he motions to the guy to pull over on the left side into the turn lane (good….good.) THEN MOTIONS FOR ME TO PULL OVER.

OH HELL NO!

I pull over and here is the exact exchange that occurred:

Officer: Good morning ‘mam, how are you?

Me: Fine, how are you?

O: Going a little fast today?

M: No.

O: Well, I clocked you at 56 in a 45.

M: No, you didn’t.

O: Mam, the gun don’t lie, I clocked you.

M: Oh, I am aware the gun doesn’t lie, but you didn’t clock ME going 56.

O: How do you know that?

M: Because it’s true. See, I live about five minutes from this intersection and have for seven years now. About five years ago I became aware of this speed trap, when I got a ticket. I also know that you more then likely have another speed trap down the road, about four miles, at the intersection of blah and blah.

O: How do you know that we have one there too?

M: Because you ALWAYS do and after I got that ticket I swore to never speed on this road again.

O: How fast were you going?

M: 48-50, I travel this road at least twice a day, sometimes more, five days a week. I know how fast I was going.

O: Well that other guy was going 61 and you guys were right next to each other.

M: No, we weren’t.

O: Well when I clocked yo….

M: No. He was BEHIND me and I know you saw him fly past me…

O: Yes, ‘mam he definitely flew past you

M: Well before he flew past me, he was behind me riding my ass and then switching lanes and then accelerated until he saw you standing there. I knew you were going to be there because you ALWAYS are and I knew you’d be clocking because it isn’t raining.

O: Okay…

M: My point, Officer, is that you pointed at my car and clocked him at 56 while he was riding between the lanes to pass me, then when he got into the left lane, he was going 61, which I can see right there on the radar gun you keep showing me…

O: Well, it’s true that I clocked you and then him and then when I clocked you it showed you going a lot slower….

M: Well you and I both know that there is no way he could have flown pass me, as you say, with me simply going a measly 4 miles under him. So then it’s possible that you clocked him passing me since he was in my lane and the left hand lane as well?

O: Well, I guess it cou…..

M: Thanks for the warning, I’ll slow it down to 45.

O: Have a nice day ‘mam!

M: You too.

I truly have a lot of respect for anyone who serves our community, state, nation, country but it’s fair to admit that these speed traps are a pain in the ass. They set them up around blind corners, hide behind the bushes and catch people on a road that has barely any turn offs, is divided two lanes each way and that “feels” 55 mph! It’s only us locals who are aware of these and rarely ever get caught because these guys are there almost every single day it isn’t raining. There was no way I was going to take the blame for this jackass behind me. Regardless I got out of my FIRST TICKET EVER TODAY which begs the question… IS THE CURSE OVER?!