Porter’s “Other name”

In England they say “Surname” for “Last name.” This took Eric and I some getting used to. Sort of like when they ask your birthdate and you automatically lead with the month as we were taught in the states instead of the day as they list it here. I’ve had to cross out many a “date” because of this because you’re trained to do it a certain way, it is hard to remember.

Well I ran into Porter’s teacher the other day and she was cracking up as she pulled me aside to tell me this story.

Teach: “I cracked up today when I saw something Porter wrote.”

Me: “Uh oh…”

Teach: “No, no, it’s fine – here let me tell you what happened.”

Me: “Uh oh…”

Teach: (smiling) “So Porter was writing out his name on his spelling test and it says ‘Surname’ so he wrote ‘Porter Bray'”

Me: “Uh oh…”

Teach: (laughing now) “So then for ‘other name’ *meaning first name* he writes… P. MAN!”

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

I’m still here (just barely)

So I know this blog is lagging, I promise to get back to the normal day to day stuff but with us trying to move from Georgia to London, England, I’m a little bit preoccupied! I hope to get back to normal within a few months during this move but for now I’ll leave you with this.

We’re at Mellow Mushroom the other day where they have a huge Transformer Bumblebee in the corner. It’s busy but not packed. I see the Transformer so I get Porter’s attention and point it out to him and go over with my iPhone to take a picture of it and Gracie goes with me. So we’re standing there, I’m taking a picture and Gracie yells to the huge group of guys sitting next to the sculpture, “LOOK! THE BUMBLEBEE HAS A WIENER!”

Ugh. Luckily that’s the least of my concerns so I chuckled, shrugged my shoulders and ate my pie.

Bumblebee, We see your wiener.

Porter “Spiderman’s” a wall in London

Porter tries to run and grab a wall outside of a restaurant in London when we were visiting. I just though it was cute and his determination was spot on…

ICE CREAM!

Took the kids to Carvel Ice Cream shop the other day to celebrate a successful first week at school and they were allowed (per Eric) to get three scoops of any ice cream and although he said “THREE TOPPINGS ONLY” I think they ended up with five at least. I cannot get over how happy they look in these pictures!

First Day of School

"My ice cream is HUGE!"

"NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM"

Wasps at the Eiffel Tower

So the other day I go into my master bathroom to brush my teeth and get ready for bed and I found a wasp on one of my large pictures on my wall. He was so perfectly camouflaged that I think I would have missed him if I hadn’t turned slightly to see him from the side. It was such a cool effect. It was like he chose the perfect place to hide. I guess he was working on his bucket list. #4 See the Eiffel Tower…

See if you can find him in the first picture.

Where's Waspo?

 

 

 

 

 

There he is!

More Porterisms

Driving down the road Porter asks me “If I swallow ink, will it make me sick?”

Uh oh. Whenever Porter asks a question like this it means he’s already done it and get Poison Control on speed dial.

So I tell him that it depends and he says, “Well I was sucking on this marker (non toxic thankfully) to see if there was any more ink in it and it didn’t get into my mouth but I’m sure there is ink.”

Ok – crisis adverted… awesome.

So then he says “You know, I do some DANGEROUS things – like putting things in my mouth that might make me sick… I really need to invent a sucking machine…”

BWA HA HA HA HA

My son the rational thinker

So my kids are like ANY other siblings. They fight constantly. It’s funny too because sometimes when people see that they are adopted they say things like “do they act like brother and sister?” After my look of annoyance I inform them that YES they act like all siblings do because they ARE related. Silly people. It’s not as if you have to share the same blood line to annoy each other. Anyways, here is what I overheard today:

Gracie: MOMMMMEEEE PORTER SLAPPED ME!

Porter: No, I DIDN’T

Me: Porter did you slap your sister?

Porter: NO, I didn’t, she’s lying.

Gracie: YES YOU DID, YOU did like THIS (actually slaps herself)

Porter: NO GRACIE, I DID NOT!

Me: Porter, tell the truth

Porter: I AM!!!!

Gracie: Mommy, he DID slap me!

Porter: (Looks at Gracie) That’s NOT a SLAP – THAT’S A PUNCH!

WHAT?!?!

The roof, the roof, the roof is on FIRE!

It was just a matter of time before Porter got ahold of a lighter and lit something on fire. Luckily for me, it was contained and I was able to stop him immediately (and I wasn’t the one who left the lighter out!) SOMEONE, (not me) left our lighter for our Big GreenEgg out on the porch one day and even though it’s a really hard lighter to turn on (lots of child proof thingys) he still managed to not only turn the lighter on but set on fire a huge drawing sheet I had for them to paint on. As you know, if it is quiet in my house then someone is up to no good. After about 14 seconds of silence I began frantically searching the house to see what was up. I finally found him outside and as soon as the door opened he jumped and the evidence went behind his back. I know immediately what he had done. So we had another nice long talk about “experiments” and how when adults experiment with things like that we make sure that we have protective gear on and that it is in a controlled environment. Suffice it to say that the pyrotechnics could have been really, really bad and I hope he learned his lesson as did we about leaving things out that are “child proof.”

This leads me to my own fire story. I was camping out with my parents in their RV one summer and SOMEONE (not me) had left a lighter out on the picnic table. I wondered, “Hmmm, what happens if I light this towel on fire?” I of course found out rather quickly as the towel went up in flames. Now, I remember throwing the towel into the woods to hide it once the fire was out. My parents claim that I threw it, lit, under the gas tank of the RV thus almost killing everyone in the entire campground. Geez, they are SO melodramatic.

Here is a pic of Porter’s “experiment…”

More Summer fun

Some more pictures of how we have enjoyed Summer of 2009. Although I broke my foot and had surgery in July, my a/c in my car and home have both had to be replaced and we had some of our roof repaired, we’ve still had a really good time. Thankfully our backyard is finished and the kids can enjoy playing outside while our dog and puppy get some exercise. Since our backyard is fenced in, we’ve become quite popular and the kids have really been enjoying their friends. With preschool for Porter right around the corner, I leave you with some of our favorite memories:

Pool Days

So today I decided that I would finally take Porter and Gracie to the pool today. In my mind it went like this; towel, sunscreen, toys… done. In reality it took quite a bit longer.

First off, my kids wanted to go immediately when I suggested it. Unfortunately it took a good thirty minutes just to round everything up to get there. I had to first undress them, then apply the spray on sunscreen, which if applied in the house on hardwood floors, quickly makes the floors so slippery that you would have thought we had coated them in canola oil. So then I had to mop up the sprayed area and take the kids outside to finish up applying sunscreen. Then it had to soak in all the while listening to the constant whine of “why aren’t we leaving yet?!” Then there were toys to find, flotation devises to summon from last years pool days. Oh wait, just kidding. Because my 2 year old daughter grows at double her rate so the cute little 3T bathing suit/life vest that she worse last year is about the size of her big toe. So scratch that, everyone into the car so we can run up to Target to get a life vest/swimsuit that will fit a 41lb 2 year old.

Check that and we’re back home. Now time to put on our bathing suits… remember my daughter who grows so fast? Back to target because the 3T bathing suits from last year, still don’t fit. Now check that again and we’re back home. Time to reapply the sunscreen and wait for it to soak in….cue the whine.

NOW that we successfully sunscreened  and suited up, time to pack the toys bag with goggles, masks, toys, water and snacks. Alright kids, get in the car…we are ready! Here we go, we’re driving to the pool…. oh shit, turn around (sorry kids – please stop whining) because I didn’t even have towels. That’s right – I forgot the towels. So back home, grab the towels and head back out the door. Drive to the pool feeling pretty good that I had remembered everything… get there and WHOOPS! Still need the key to get in. (Insert cuss word here). Back into the car. Now the kids are beyond whining and actually crying at this point. Back home to search every drawer, cabinet and beach bag to find the key from last summer to get into the pool only to have Porter walk up to me and go, “isn’t the key attached to your bag that’s in the car on the keychain?” (insert worse cuss word here). Back into the car, drive to the pool, get there, unlock door, set things down…. and…… OH…(insert worst cuss word you know here) because it’s way past Gracie’s nap time and no one’s even eaten lunch. Awesome.

PS. I did let them swim for an hour – they deserved it!